Slaves of Desire

That is what we have become… Slaves of desire.

Mr. Philip Kotler had talked about needs, wants and desires and a gradual progression that happens but in this day and age, I believe desire is the only thing and progression is through various degrees of desire. Probably I will add craving as the next step after desire.

It is the signs of time that what we think is a need today is actually what desire was couple of decades back.

It is all a function of access, availability and aspirations. I am not saying anything new but opening up of the country has led us to recalibrate our needs.

The frugality of the past, driven by basic necessities themselves being scarce… we moved up gradually. Our earnings were never quite what they are today. So accumulation and investing for future used to be of primary importance. But today, even a mobile phone is not a novelty for a kid, when in the past having a phone connection itself used to be a luxury.

But what I have said so far is just in terms of materialistic desires. At a mental level too, our desires have grown exponentially.

Yes we desire materialistic comforts, but we also have a desire for relationships. Relationships of our choosing and not the ones that are thrust upon us. Compatibility is a big thing and therefore staying single longer is not a wrong thing. Live-in relationships are increasing. When compatibility is what we seek, divorce rates are also going up. While the conformists might question what I say, marriage as an institution is well past its ‘sell by’ date and under severe threat. And no more staying in the closet for the gays and lesbians. No more killing desires for the fear of being an outcaste. Sexuality and talking about sex is no more a taboo. Trust me.. it isn’t. There are products and brands that are available for our kinks and desires.

Sapiosexual as a term is the term of this decade. Who would have thought that someday intelligence and intellect will be a turn on and not be an intense discussion over a cup of coffee in a coffee shop.

We are now ready to experiment and break past the societal rules. Dating apps are a reflection of the fact that we are  not ready to settle with what we have around us. Tinder setting up an office in India suggests that there is more to this country and changing mores than meets the eyes. There is still a large part of the society that acts holier than thou and hypocritical as always, but the tectonic plates are shifting and the churn will happen before settling into a certain level of maturity after our desires are satiated.

And of course not to forget my favorite topic… food! sex and food kind of go hand in hand… and if shifts are happening in terms of sexual desires, so is the experimentation with food. Porn and Foodporn! our food habits have undergone a radical change. We have learnt to and revel in experimenting with our food. Food is now for arousing new taste sensations and not a need to fill our stomachs anymore.

So slaves of desire… that is what we have become. For far too long we restrained ourselves. Kept all temptations away. but the floodgates were opened a while back and there is no stopping us. We have let our desires take over our existence. We have learnt to let our senses and the pleasures that can be derived from arousing and titillating these senses take over.

Some would say that we are perhaps become decadent. Morally and culturally corrupt. But eh.. who are these people? and who gave them the right to sit in judgement when we all know that due to sheer lack of opportunity, they are not able to indulge themselves. Or who knows what they do when the night falls and the doors are closed?

I say we have one life. And while in terms of longevity, we might be living longer, it still is a short life. Why let it be boring and plain. Let’s make the most of it!

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